I remember…

I am joining up with the Weekly Writing Challenge from WordPress for the first time today. You take the line I remember, set a time for 10 minutes and just write…making sure your fingers don’t stop along the way.

The challenge for me was finding 10 minutes that I didn’t have to deal with a husband or kids 🙂

So this is my I remember… I used to wait for Summer. I love the sound of the birds singing in the morning, waking up and knowing that it is really warm outside and I can go out in whatever outfit I chose. I don’t have to throw on a big jacket or clothes that make me feel big and fat. I still love summer but recently I have found myself thinking about Fall. It actually amazes me because I used to get depressed around then knowing that Winter was just around the corner, but thinking about the cooler nights when I can wear a sweater, buying Kettle Corn at one of the local farms and getting my kids in the car to go check out the changing leaves on all the streets is exciting.

When I think about Fall now for some reason my biggest memory and the one that always pops into my head is walking into one of the rehab centers to visit my dad. It seems so insignificant and it wasn’t even the last place that he was in, but for some reason it sticks in my head. I remember walking in and they had hay bails on the side of the door, big scarecrows and pumpkins. The air was crisp, but had a feeling of clean and fresh when you breathed it deep into your lungs. The trees were all changing and the colors were beautiful. I don’t even remember what it looked like when we walked inside. I remember the whole parking lot and my family flying in from Ireland to visit my dad. We were playing in the parking lot with my kids. One of them on my cousin’s shoulder’s laughing away as if not a care in the world.

At that time she didn’t have a care in the world, she was 8 months old when my dad had his stroke, so going to the hospital was nothing new for her. It makes me sad to think that she will never know my dad without being in a wheelchair, but part of me is a little happy to know that she doesn’t have to “relearn” her relationship with him. I don’t know which is worse… the fact that he could have possibly played ball with her, horse, all that fun “granda” stuff and then all of a sudden it was taken away from her OR the fact that this is just her normal and she loves him and talks about him every. single. day.

Seasons come and go, they are the one constant in our lives. In NY we know we will have Spring, Summer, Fall and Winter, but we have to chose to take the little moments out of our daily lives and turn them into memories. Turn them into things that make you smile when you think of the next season approaching. In this world it is so easy to get glum, sad, angry, depressed and I am in no way saying that I am happy all the time. I just try to focus on the better moments and the things that make me happy. I tell my kids every day as often as I think of it (and that’s a ton) that I do love them and that they are precious. Even when I am arguing with my almost 4 year old I make sure to tell her that even though I am mad I love her always and I will always be here.

So with the seasons changing what will your memories be? What memories do you have from this Summer and the upcoming seasons? I would love to hear them!

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