I’m sure most of us have seen the above statement on fb or twitter. Well, it is very true. There are days when I actually forget what day it is (mostly in the summer because L is now in school 5 days a week.) I love being a mom, I have said this before, I was made for it. I can’t remember a time when I didn’t want to have a little one attached to my hip or calling me mom. It is simply the greatest feeling in the world, but it’s hard work.
I have two points to make… Working mom’s. *now now remember this is a no judge zone so this won’t be a rant*
I feel like working mom’s sometimes get slack that is totally unwarranted. I know there are a lot of moms that have to work, they have no choice. They get up in the morning, get the kids up, the husband up (haha) and schlep out the door to drop off the kids and then head to work. Then they work a full day, pick up the kids, get home just in time to make everyone dinner and then get the kids off to bed. I have to be honest that would kill me. I want a job… I have always felt that I don’t contribute to the household because I don’t bring in much money (other than the stuff that I bring in from my Etsy shop) but in saying that, I couldn’t work full time. I can only work a PT job. I couldn’t be away from the kids all day long. Plus I would need to make a ton of money to even justify me sending them to daycare.
So to all the working mom’s out there…I know your job is hard, I know leaving the kids all day is hard and I know that a lot of you wonder if you are doing the right thing because you hear stupid comments from other people… As long as you are doing what you need to do for your family it is the right thing!
My second point is for all the Stay at Home Mom’s…. This is the most rewarding job in the world. The smiles first thing in the morning, the I Love You’s, The hugs, cuddles, thank you’s, Your welcome’s are amazing. You also have the I hate you’s, NO’s, tantrums, boogers, tears, pushing, screaming, whining which are the yucky parts. You are also lucky to get out of the house with a clean shirt on and your hair done, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. The only thing that I find difficult as a SAHM is that people don’t think you do anything. Certain people think that you sit on the couch, eating all day, while your kids just run around and take care of themselves. In my opinion this is the toughest job out there. It takes a certain kind of person to be a SAHM. It’s not for everyone… there are days where yes, I want to run away but only for a few hours :). Days when I wonder why I didn’t sign up for the vacation/sick package and then realize it’s because there was never one offered. This is the type of job that you work through on your best and even on your worst day. I have worked through migraines, holding a kid on my hip while throwing up in the bathroom, suffering through morning sickness for 9 months while watching L, having spinal surgery and not being able to pick L up for three months. It’s tough, but as long as you have a good support system and a group of friends to talk to then you can excel.
Every mom thinks that they are alone on an island. “Is anyone else yelling at their kids?” ” Does anyone else have trouble potty training, or trouble with getting their kids to sleep?” “Is my kid the only one that doesn’t eat that well, or eats too much?” I guarantee any question that you ask has already been asked by at least 1 million other moms. I don’t know why we are all made to feel like we are alone. I don’t think its an intentional thing, I think its because as mothers, as soon as we give birth, we expect ourselves to have all the answers. Kids don’t come with a manual, and even it they did none of us would have time to read it! We are so sleep deprived in the first 3+ months that we would read the same sentence in that manual over and over until it made no sense at all, so it wouldn’t do us any good anyway! Motherhood can be lonely, but no one should let it be that way. If you don’t have anyone to talk to them jump on the internet. There are groups, blogs and even websites devoted to moms (and dads) and answering questions.
In my experience the greatest part of L starting school is me getting friends out of it as well. I thought before she started that it would be a great meeting place for her. She would have friends that she would start school with and possibly go all the way through high school with. I didn’t realize that I would get some amazing friends out of it as well. Every one of the mom’s that L goes to school with I consider a friend. Some of them I am just getting to know because they just joined our classroom this year, but the ones from last year are amazing. We have gone out, done breakfast, had lunch and we all talk before and after school. I look forward to talking to them every day because it’s nice to have people that experience the same things as you. You can freely talk about poop without people judging you (to all the non-moms out there, OHHHHH you wait!! You all say that you will never talk about poop but I guarantee it will happen within the first few months LOL)
Bottom line is every mom does things differently. We all parent differently and we all have different lifestyles. At the end of the night when you put your head on your pillow as long as you can sleep well knowing your family is taken care of that’s all that matters. We get judged by everyone, for every decision that we make so why worry about what everyone else is thinking. Do things the way that work best for you. Don’t worry about what other kids are doing or where other kids are it will only drive you crazy. Worry about your kiddo’s and how they are doing and love them no matter what.
If you are a working mom or a SAHM we all want the same things. We want our kids to be the best that they can be and to grow up to be happy and healthy adults. So the next time that you feel like judging a mom for dropping her kids off at day care or you are losing patience with the mom that brought her three kids to the mall with her during lunch hour please take a minute to instead appreciate that she is taking care of her family,, and realize that she loves her kids unconditionally. And maybe instead of judging someone, we could offer to hold the door open for them or to help them when they look like they need it because we are all cut from the same cloth and love for our kids feels the same the whole world over.